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26th December 2002

Everything Must Go!

The traditional Boxing day battle of wills took place right on cue.

A nice hangover-busting trip with the lads down to Hillsborough to watch the Wednesday / Forest game (or Wakey-Emley's homer in the Unibond). Or a full on sale of the century raid on Meadowhall with every credit card in the known universe.

In otherwords a girl thing or a boy thing.

I lost.

So there I was with a bastard of a hangover being dragged from pillar to post down the mall. My job was to carry the bags.

I'm a totally useless get when it comes to shopping. I just don't see the point in bobbing in and out of these glittering places looking for bargains.

To me a bargain is staying at home until you absolutely HAVE to replace the item in question. Either it breaks, or it tears or it snaps. None of this 30% off crap - if the shop still making money on this stuff then its not a bargain.

I try very hard, I really do, but when the gals nipped into Ann Summers I was gone - Those places would be fine if some of the girls in the changing rooms came out to give us a twirl or two, but those places are perve city and I'll be damned if I'm going to stand there grinning at it all like something out of Father Ted.

I've always ended up shopping with the girl who loves OXFAM shops. Or these Cheap Chick shops. She's off cooing at some rack of old granny cardigans and I'm literally holding the bag. I'm usually stood there so long I get mistaken for the security guard. Over there by the corsets, madam, you can't miss it.

Aargh!!

I'm an in and out shopper me. I get the credit card all drained out so I can go in, and get the whole operation done in five minutes flat. I can get my entire Christmas shopping done in about 40 minutes.

I suppose I should save up and study the papers to find out exactly where these sale bargains are, but I can never think of something I need badly enough that can justify these Bank Holiday blitzes.

And I'm not going to spend my New Years Eve camped out with a Millets sleeping bag to get on Look North's mad sale shopper round up.

I'm not. Don't look at me like that...

Blogga.

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